Workers’ biggest fear about retirement is losing a sense of purpose. That fear is not unfounded. This is one of the negative aspects of early retirement that no one likes to talk about.
For the first several months, maybe up to a year, you may feel a little lost. Steady paychecks are gone. The camaraderie of coworkers disappears during long, drunken lunches. Low grade sadness may occur. But it passes, and when it passes, you naturally find new purpose on your own terms.
I know this firsthand. I retired in 2012 and have been experiencing every ups and downs of early retirement and semi-retirement since then. Despite everything, I wouldn’t trade a single year of that freedom for more money. Offer me millions and I would still choose time spent with my kids, my health, and my life over spending 60 hours a week chasing someone else’s dream.
But this post is not just for those who want to retire or retire early.
With companies like Block laying off 40% of their workforce, the combination of overhiring and accelerating AI productivity gains, many other bloated companies will inevitably follow. If you have been fired from a job, or suspect you may be fired, I want to dispel the fear that you will permanently lose your sense of purpose and meaning.
You won’t.
Yes, a job gives you purpose. The problem arises when it becomes your only source.
It’s easy to find meaning and purpose in small things
It took me about 12 months to recover from the initial shock of early retirement. By the third year I was completely settled and there was no going back. What I’ve found in 14 years of being unemployed is that the little things provide just as much purpose as the big things.
I want to share a random day that represents exactly what I want to say.
Managing rental properties can be difficult, but it also serves a surprising purpose. Something always needs to be fixed, and there is satisfaction in fixing things.
On the morning of February 27, my tenant emailed me to say that the outside side door was rotting. A few years ago that email would have bothered me a bit. This time, due to the stock market crash, my kids were in school and my wife was teaching in another city, I was alone at home and bored. When the email arrived, I was really relieved.
I called my servant and we met the tenant at the property at 10 am. We measured, talked it over and arrived at a solid core wood door. We briefly considered fiberglass or metal for weather resistance, but neither can be easily cut or sanded for an exact fit.
Wood won. It was really fun solving problems together.
more things to do
While my assistant was there, I put her to work on two other items that were sitting on my mental list.
First, I asked him to climb on the roof and spray sealant on parts of the light well that were leaking after a particularly violent storm. The problem was the same eight years ago, when three to four inches of water had accumulated in a clogged drain.
Second, I asked him to adjust a side gate that was bent and not locking properly.
The solid wood door and new door knob cost $400 plus another $350 for labor. Not that bad. I found it useful for my tenant for 35 minutes. I also watered the curb and front yard for the other 15 as insurance that they would be forgotten.
I gave the business to a servicer I have been trusting since 2020, someone who is not the cheapest option but has never let me down. And I took another small step toward securing a significant portion of my semi-passive retirement income.
It’s a very nice morning.
next purposeful discovery
After a tour of the property, I went to my office mailbox to drop off nine signed copies of my USA TODAY bestseller, millionaire milestones For readers who took advantage of the free Empower financial checkup. You can still participate by clicking this post And follow the simple instructions.
It felt really meaningful to write personal notes in each copy. I spent about $200 on the books and shipping, and I don’t mind at all. These are readers who care deeply about their finances and are longtime readers of Financial Samurai.
Afterwards I had lunch at my favorite Vietnamese noodle place, and brought extra food home for family dinner.
A signed book, a bowl of pho, a cherished family. Not a bad afternoon.
Time to break to write this post
After lunch I sat down to write this post to help retirees and the recently unemployed feel better about an uncertain future. Sharing first-hand experiences has been beneficial for years, and that day was no different.
Maybe this is not for you to write. Maybe it’s applying for jobs in a completely different field, or taking continuing education courses to become certified in something new. Or maybe go for a 30-minute run to lose those last 10 pounds. Even if the scale doesn’t move, you’ll definitely feel better afterward.
For me, doing something mentally stimulating after any type of physical activity provides a pleasant balance. Typically, I will play tennis or pickleball for 1-2.5 hours. However, I was struggling with an injury.
Nap time and then school pickup
My favorite thing to do after a hearty lunch is take a nap. No apology. It’s also easier to take a nap after doing some useful work, like writing a post.
Then I picked up my wife from the school where she was substitute teaching, and took her to our children’s school for a Girl Scouts troop meeting.
My wife insisted on taking the bus and subway to our school, she didn’t want to feel like she was excluding me from school. I insisted on driving it anyway. He said he felt bad that I was acting like his Uber driver. I told him that his driving was the reason I took over 500 Uber rides in 2015. I was training for these moments.
In the end, I saved 30 minutes of her commute time and got her to Girl Scouts before the 3:30 pm start time. Helping my wife always makes me feel useful. It is also good for our relationship.
After picking up the kids we ate Vietnamese food together, helped them with homework for 30 minutes, then ended the night with the kids and me being totally silly in the hot tub. Bath and bed by 9pm.
Little things add up to a lot of meaning
That day, I didn’t close any big business deals or present in front of hundreds of people. Nor did I attend any fancy conferences where I socialized with powerful people. Instead I did many small things that made me feel like I mattered. And that was more than enough.
When we get caught up in climbing the corporate ladder and chasing status and prestige, we forget that there are countless other sources of meaning outside of work.
We convince ourselves that purpose must come from a promotion, a bigger paycheck, or a more impressive title. But I promise you, it doesn’t have to be that way.
The little things in life can provide just as much meaning as the Senior Vice President or Managing Director on your LinkedIn profile, often more.
Diversify your identity before you retire or get fired
The risk of tying your entire identity to your career is that you slowly stop investing in everything else. And when the inevitable day comes that you leave your job, willingly or not, the emptiness feels overwhelming because you never diversified your identity.
From gardening to teaching your kids guitar to washing dishes with an intention, there are countless ways to find purpose when you don’t have a day job.
And within three months of your departure, hardly anyone at your old company will be thinking about you. Your position will be liquidated or filled by someone else trying to touch his quarterly figures.
then go ahead. Embrace the freedom that retirement or unemployment brings. Don’t worry about becoming an aimless, aimless soul. You’ll find something meaningful to do, no matter what stage of life you’re in.
Readers, if you are unemployed or retired, have you been able to find a new purpose in your free time? Do you think some people tie their identity too much to their career, to the detriment of everything else? And don’t workers really realize how quickly they will be forgotten once they leave?
Negotiate a severance package and be free
If you are thinking of quitting your job or think you are about to be laid off, don’t quit. By quitting you are left with nothing. On the other hand, negotiating a severance package can give you a meaningful financial path and breathing room to figure out what happens next.
My wife and I both negotiated our separation. That money gave us the courage to move forward and never look back. Since retiring in 2012 and 2015, respectively, we have traveled extensively, written a few more best-selling books, and become stay-at-home parents of two. Life has been amazing so far.
If you want to learn how to do this, grab a copy of my best-selling ebook How to engineer your layoff. Use code “SAVETEN” to save $10 check out.
